Jessica Leigh Baldwin

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Saying Goodbye To The People Who Make A Place A Home

A colleague of mine who has recently completed multiple cross country and international moves inquired how my "goodbyes" were going. It was a wonderfully empathetic question that only someone who has made that leap necessarily understands, because my current answer is “not great”. 

When I was accepted in September, it felt like I had plenty of time to let people know about this life change and to start saying my goodbyes. For those of you who have made such a move, and as my colleague kindly told me, it is an impossible task. Your days quickly fill up with tasks trying to maintain your daily life, and then get compounded by your task list for the move. We have tried to reach out to so many around us to let them know about the move, but with such a short timeline and limited availability - sometimes we are notifying friends and saying goodbye all in the same conversation. I have not figured out how to remedy this. With six weeks left, I am not sure how to best maximize my time. A going away party feels tempting - but such events rarely allow for quality time with each person. I realize that a part of this is coming to terms with the fact that even if I do not sleep from now until I depart, I won’t be able to say goodbye to everyone who has impacted and touched my life here in San Francisco. There are just so many!

One goodbye I did get to make a couple weeks ago really got me thinking about this subject. Joey and I found ourselves walking in the Inner Sunset one evening. It felt like the perfect opportunity for an impromptu dinner date, and I suggested we go to Bangkok 900, the Thai food restaurant next to my first apartment that I had not been to in years. The staff at Bangkok 900 fed me at least once a week for five years when I lived in Cole Valley. As a naive nineteen year old who could barely boil water, their food often kept me alive when I was taking a full course load in school and working part-time. They were on my speed dial, and they knew it was me whenever I called. On the day I graduated from college, they ran out when they saw me in my cap and gown to congratulate me. I am was not special though - they treat all their customers in such a personable way. When I moved to the Mission, I did not find much time to make it back there and I doubted the staff would now remember me after a six year hiatus. But boy was I wrong! Not only did Joey and I have a delicious meal, it was also a wonderful catch-up. I had the opportunity to not only say good-bye, but to thank them for being such an important part of my San Francisco experience. 

This is what I wish I had time to do with everyone. Not just my friends and family, but everyone who has made an impact on my life here in San Francisco and who have made this place my home. There is so much humanity in this city - and that is what I will miss the most.